My Favorite Homer:
Or How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love Tommy Heinsohn
By Sam Stern
February 15, 2004
My hatred for the Celtics developed immediately upon moving to Boston three years ago. The transformation of my feelings from indifference to contempt may have had something to do with the budding rivalry between the Celts and my team, the Nets, but I think the root of my animosity is the intolerable, utterly unprofessional “Homerism” of the Celtics TV color man, former coach, and former player, Tommy Heinsohn. If you have never heard him call a game, then you cannot even begin to imagine his shtick. I have yet to bear witness to a Celtics loss that Heinsohn didn’t attribute in large part to the referees and the unfair play of Celtic opponents.
Clearly, Tommy Heinsohn has discerned a plot – invisible to the rest of us – by the league to punish his Celtics, carried out by referees, and he is the first soldier into the breach to battle this injustice. This mentality is displayed in Heinsohn’s angry reactions anytime Celtics star shooting guard Paul Pierce gets touched. Heinsohn is overbearing and protective of Pierce, like a father is for his teenage daughter. Fouls committed on Pierce are not part of the game, they are a systematic effort to cripple him. If the foul is not called, Heinsohn practically storms the court to berate the refs. How do you know when the ref has gone by the courtside press table where Heinsohn sits? Because that’s when Heinsohn raises his voice to yell loud enough, “Hey ref, you’re horrible” so the ref can hear him.
Heinsohn also takes up the cause of inferior players, who have practically no place in the league. Celtics 12th man – until last week’s trade to Phoenix – Walter McCarty is just the most prominent example of this incurable obsession that Heinsohn has for untalented role players, with little discernible talent, and little motivation to get better.
Worst of all for non-Celtics fans trying to watch the games because they enjoy basketball (like myself), Heinsohn can ruin the joy of watching the game. Heinsohn doesn’t offer objective analysis of the action, rarely offers praise for the opposition, and spends most of his time carping at the officials, functioning mostly as lead heckler of the Fleet Center crowd. Bottom-line: I can’t watch games on TV, without Heinsohn causing my blood to boil.
And this is why my disdain for Tommy Heinsohn’s antics has actually made him my favorite announcer. Honestly, who else could make the Celtics interesting? Who else could cause me to exhibit some emotion while watching the NBA these days, with the Celtics being near the worst offering of the NBA’s product currently on display? I don’t tune in to watch them jack threes and pile up turnovers, I tune in to hear how Heinsohn will explain away their underachieving, or lose his cool at the mediocrity on display (Heinsohn played on 8 Celtics championship teams, coached 2 championship teams and has witnessed 3 more as a broadcaster). Until his trade, I tuned in to hear Heinsohn root on Walter McCarty – “I love Walta” – hoping that Heinsohn’s prodding of Walta would cause him to launch an extra three, thus further dimming the Celtics chance of winning this particular night’s game. I tune in to hear Heinsohn’s rants after officials’ non-calls.
Frankly, the Celtics lose often enough that I am more likely to enjoy the frustrated, whiny version of Heinsohn, as opposed to having to deal with the triumphant, euphoric version that pops up during Celtics wins.
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