April 13, 2004
If You Can't Say Anything Nice...
When I'm ranting and raving, I generally prefer to do so in the heat of the moment -- I will see, read or hear something that gets a stir out of me, and then put that stir into words. There are some instances, however, when I can't always write down my reaction right away. And quite often, if I don't get to it immediately, the opportunity to vent on that particular issue is gone.
Usually that's fine -- another topic will always come along. However, some things, much like headlice or the bubonic plague, will fester if ignored. Some issues still burn on even when you try to let them be. Which brings me to last Sunday, when I was watching the NBA on ABC's studio show. In general, I don't get that excited about any studio shows (with the possible exception of Inside the NBA, which I like to watch because of the genuinely amusing interaction between Charles, Kenny and EJ). In most cases, I'd much prefer to just watch the sporting event itself; the analysis doesn't often do it for me. And in rare cases, like last Sunday, the words spouted by so-called studio "talent" just downright anger me. So it was, during halftime of whatever game I was watching, that the studio rolled highlights of the Raptors' Sunday afternoon game. While these highlights were playing, studio analyst Tom Tolbert said of the Raptors, "Do they play every Sunday? We've gotta watch highlights of that team every Sunday and they're not that good."
Perhaps just reading the words doesn't do justice to the tone Tom Tolbert was using. He sounded put-out; bored, as though he were too cool for school and way too important to be sitting in a studio talking about the Toronto Raptors, of all teams. Well, sorry you were inconvenienced, Tom. That sucks that you had to get paid to watch Raptors' highlights and talk about them. That must be really awful for you.
While Tolbert's comments were particularly annoying, they are not particularly unique. Tolbert is just part of an unfortunate recent trend in sports commentating: announcers acting like (and not being afraid to say) that the event they're watching stinks. Sir Charles himself started the trend on the aforementioned Inside the NBA, rarely censoring his thoughts on games he didn't want to see. The problem is, he was good at it -- the rare exception of someone who can successfully pull off the "I'm way too cool for this garbage" act. And now it seems that one out of three studio analysts (if not more) has to act bored or put out by what he's watching.
My question is this: what ever happened to trying to make an event enjoyable? (Pardon me while I climb up onto this soapbox...) I was a camp counselor for four summers, and the first thing you learn is that if you, the counselor, act bored with what you're doing or pretend like you're too cool, the kids will follow suit because they admire you. In some way this isn't a good example, because I certainly don't admire Tom Tolbert or any of the other jackasses who like to complain about their unbelievably awesome jobs on air. Regardless, Tolbert, and others like him, are bad influences in the world of sport. He's openly saying that the stuff you the viewer are watching is crap. He's almost like an insecure teenager who is too afraid to admit that he's having fun doing something he's slightly uncomfortable with, so he relentlessly badmouths it.
Unfortunately, it's becoming an epidemic. Just one day after Tolbert's antics on Sunday, Billy Packer (who deserves an entire article to point out his flaws as a commentator) was broadcasting college basketball's national championship game. Georgia Tech was getting paddled for most of the game, but in the second half, they started to show signs of making a run. Just as things were starting to get interesting, Packer inexplicably declared, "This game has been over for some time."
Let me explain this once and for all: if you are a television commentator, your job is to make the game exciting. We, the sportsfans, want to believe that we could be watching something special, something great, even if we are not. Though they often remind us of real life, sports do not have to be a place for constant doses of obnoxious reality. How about, instead of whining that you have to watch the Raptors' every Sunday (Tom), you could instead say something like, "Man, the Raptors' suck this year, but I'd pay good money to watch Vince Carter play -- he does something electric every game." That way you could still be doing your sorry-ass Charles Barkley imitation but at least you'd have a chance of enhancing the event for your viewers. And Mr. Packer -- how about instead of declaring the game over, you simply say something like, "Tech starting to make a run here...with [x amount of time left], this thing is not yet over." Doesn't that make more sense? Isn't it your job to keep people interested?
All I'm gonna say is this: if you don't like watching the Raptors play, or if you can't have the enthusiasm to hope and believe that a team might be able to make a comeback in the most important game of the year, then your bad attitude leads to the same conclusion as your below-average commentating: you're in the wrong profession.
-Matt Stroup Copyright ©2004 instant-replays.com
